Philippine Blog Awards Acceptance Speech
The Philippine Blog Awards has extended the deadline of submission of entries from February 28 to March 4. I will be helping out at the awards night on March 31, if you call being a nuisance “help”. 
I hear there are a lot of nominees in the Personal Category, but I have no idea as I haven’t personally seen the list yet. I’ve planned on submitting my site, but I’m too lazy and…scared? :stareeyes: I’ve never taken interest in these sort of things - ever - before the Blog Parteeh last January. I haven’t even joined contests anywhere in the blogosphere *coughs*SOTM*coughs*, so it would be totally crazy of me to start with this one prestigious awards. And when I say “prestigious”, I mean it’s prestigious. I cannot stress this enough. Judges are all respected and experts in their chosen field/s. Aside from the organizers of this event - Abe, Gail, and Jayvee - the judges make me go w 
w! Don’t believe me? Allow me to reveal *some* of them….
- Bryan Veloso - Creative director at Facebook, developer at Automattic, award-winning blogger, and internationally-known designer
- Manuel L. Quezon III - Political pundit & editorial columnist of Inquirer Newspaper
- JV Rufino - Editor-in-chief of Inquirer.net
- Malou Mangahas - Editor-in-chief of GMANews.tv and co-host of TV Show Palaban
- Connie Veneracion - Filipina problogger and columnist for Manila Standard Today
That ought to scare a lot of people. 
In line with this, I have written an acceptance speech in case those who are expecting themselves to win don’t know how or have time to write one. This speech is absolutely for free! 
You can even make it as a draft if you want to write your own speech. I’ve also recorded this myself, and it’s just perfect for the alloted 1-minute speech for every category winners. 
Acceptance Speech
Thank you! Oh! Thank you! I can hardly conjugate verbs! I feel so horny! And this statue - it’s so suspiciously phallic! Oh, thank you again! I just want everyone to sulk and know that even in my wildest hallucinations, I never fantasized that blogging could ever help me get laid so much and win this award as well! And to the other suck-ass nominees, I want each of you to know how totally wonderful your fake smiles make me feel right now! Don’t forget to write long pitiful blog entries tonight about how you lost, eh?!
You know, when they first told me I was nominated, I just had to take an epidural and think that although my sexual encounters with bloggers have been great, I never would have imagined that there’s something even greater than the orgasms I get whenever I’m with them! This trophy is making me come already!
There are so many ass-kissing leeches to thank! First off though, I want to thank the senile old bats of the PBA, who looked deep within their wallets before giving me this fantastic award! Also, I want to thank WordPress, for being such a powerful force in my loins. To my fellow bloggers, who taught me to take life by the balls. And finally, to all the judges and bloggers I slept with - I couldn’t have done it without you!
Thank you Philippines, and good night!
you should join…
i would cheer for you!!!
Oops, I missed out on a couple of your entries… Sorry…
Anyways, ooh, you’ll be helping out awards night?! That’s awesome!
Ouch. BIG doesn’t even fit in BIGSHOT when it comes to the judges. I think Bryan Veloso is a genius.
Tell me, will you really do that acceptance speech if you won?!
Monalisa: I shall not.
Chau: Yikes, no problem there!
Juice: Can’t even make BIG a lot BIGGER, eh?
Haha, I just might…If only I were nominated.
Cool.. what are you gonna be doing over there? Go submit your site!!
Wow.. those judges really sound scary haha. LOL what a nice speech, im sure you’ll be cheered for that. 
You don’t need to submit your site as somebody has already nominated you. Hindi ako ang nagnominate hu? Hehe.
AhaHAhaHAaahHAHaaaHA! Yeah, that sounds just like my customized Biggest Whiner Award speech, LOL! ;). Doncha just love that speech generator?! LMAO.
I double dare ya to actually to say that speech if ya win!
I actually tried to nominate you last week, but it wouldn’t take your e-mail address. I kept getting an error message that said it wasn’t a valid address. Then I realized that someone had already submitted your blog. I think I’ve found a minor bug in the submission entry form… when a blog has already been submitted, it should actually throw out a message “already entered” instead of “invalid e-mail address”.
Anyway, I found out that I got nominated too (incoming links stats), which is really, really, really weird. I’m trying to find out who submitted my blog, but no one will fess up. I feel rather sheepish… I don’t have hubris to think that I’d actually win.
Win or lose, I’m happy enough with my Biggest Whiner Award.
Good luck - I’m rooting for ya.
ano ka ba! u are nominated! nominate din kita sa bloggers choice category…bleh
LOL. A free acceptance speech haha. I’ve never heard of Philippine Blog Awards before.. o.o
Michelle: We’re gonna have fun! Yay!
Hehe, cheered, rawr! 
Christian: Huwaaaaat?! Tumigil tibok ng puso ko!!! My gulay naman!
Fruityoaty: Oops, I forgot to give you link love for directing me to that speech generator
I did link it in the “I have written” part. 
You didn’t! Rawr! But heck, I’d root for you! I bet judges are gonna drool all over your blog
I haven’t been looking at my incoming link stats lately, and whenever I do, all I see are a bunch of Google referrals for the keywords Bamboo + Tatsulok. I’m on first page 
And socially constructed beauty also gets me a lot of hits in one of my “articles”. Whew! Should’ve paid more attention. I wonder who nominated us? 
I was planning to nominate you tomorrow, but I guess someone did the dirty work for me. 
Liz: Waaaaag! Mahiya naman ako sa balat kong itim
Ikaw ba nag-nominate sa akin? Isa kang taksiiiiiiiiiil!!! 
Inonominate din kita sa lahat ng categories 
Harmony: No sweat. It’s only in the Philippines.
haha! ang kulit ng speech!
Omy.
Shari, dare ito, pag nanalo ka gamitin mo yang speech na yan ha. Sige na! hehehehe! Patok ang speech na yan!
Ariane: Thank you, thank you.
Joni: Because I’m hella sure I won’t win (I won’t even make it as one of the finalists), I’ll take on that dare.
I’ll bring a copy along on the awards night and give it to one unexpected winner. 
Can I go submit your site?
haha! i love the speech. so.. unique and original!
superb!
what a speech! so hot…i thought it was from The Man Blog! if you land as a finalist–i promise, i’m gonna attend, root for you…and wait for you recite this acceptance speech!
Witty ka talaga! hahahahaha!
Dre: Don’t!
Haha! I’ll nominate you as well if you do. But then, I just found out that I’ve already been nominated. Grrrr.
Dyei: Praktisin mo! LOL
Sexy Mom: I guess I wouldn’t have to worry about having to recite this acceptance speech, but I do hope you’d still attend.
You are nominated too anyway. 
And you’re one of the most admirable bloggers I’m rooting for, haha!
Jun: Noooo. I’m not.
mare huli ka na sa balita, tagalng wala si bryan veloso sa automattic, pinalitan na siya ng isa pang matt :P
my blog was nominated! yoohoo! hehehe
eto ang tanong, pano kung ang manalo ay isa sa mga websites ng organizers, hindi kaya sabihin ng ibang tao na luto yun? hehehe
Mae: Huwat?! Kelan pa? At saan? But hey, still, he’s a person to be admired.
Ate Ems: Websites of the organizers, and those affiliated with them, are not allowed to join. It’s in the FAQ page.
Haha wala akong binatbat sa mga nominees.
nung nakita ko si bryan veloso (avalonstar) would be judging, parang gusto ko na tanggalin ang submission ko
Hi Shari! The acceptance speech is great, the bravest person who would say that would definitely go home with a bruise! Hehe.
I would be
messinghelping around there too!Ellie: Kumusta naman ako?
Jorge: Good thing you didn’t. I’d have personally nominated your blog hehe.
Darwin: Oops, wasn’t able to respond to you in the groups, was I? I can’t let you trail behind me. I don’t know the way! I’ll be the one who will be doing the trailing. Or, to make things fairer, sabay na lang tayo. Walang mauuna. Madaya ka nung Blog Parteeh eh haha!
No, not a bruise. A whole bunch of new lovers!
sumali na kaw! dati sumali na ako jan eh. malagay lang doon sa list ay cool na. hehe. saws. sali ka na.
take care, shari.
You! I nominated you! ^.^ So expect yourself on the list. =P
Also… You’re acceptance speech is uhm…
Laasya: Rawr! But if it would increase the ass-cracking I’d get, why not?
Euri: Yoooouuuu!!!! Ikaw pala ang salarin!
Joanna:
erm, shari, since you’re helping… i saw the judges’ roster: do me a favor and have my blog stricken out, would you?
Response to 3420:
oo naman noh! ang galing galing kaya niya
tagal na rin… november ata… bakit ba… nasa blog niya yun eh.. late ko na nga rin nalaman pero sure ako last year pa ata siya wala dun, ewan ko lang kung nabalik siya pero this has something to do with designing wp’s backend…
ayos! pang-Mtv musics awards… hehe…
sigurado mananalo ka dun tsong! goodluck!
I like your new layout!!
Haha that acceptance speech is funny. I think you should submit your site! Who knows?? You could win and then you’ll get to make your acceptance speech. Yes, that one.
I would’ve written the same speech! What a coincidence.
Step 2: Make all the other nominees’ sites crash during the entire judging period…
You actually thought of winning? Me, I’m just looking forward to get my ass kicked around by those A-Listers.
wahaha. todays funniest event is brought to you by shari’s acceptance speech. im down on the floor laughing. srsly!
tihs was a nice and neath blog. and i know ill be back here.
WOW Shari I love the new look of your site.Its amazing.You should nominate yourself in those awards.You should hear me now haha…Getting picked by the judges is surely different eh..Its like Oscar hah..Ohh and the acceptance speech is funny!!
holy crap. that is the best speech i HAVE EVER HEARD!!! you should so use it. lmao. so the judges are a lil intimidating. i would be terrified to enter my blog in something like that. then again, i wouldn’t even get further than submission.
ha ha…….
the jester-in-exile: But huwaaaay?! Yours is one of the blogs I’m rooting for!
Mae: Oh. Oh. Oh. But why does his profile in the PBA site says he’s still with Automattic?
Dotep: Baliw. Hindi noh!
Aurus: No way! LOL LOL LOL
Benj: I’m sure you’ll be able to write a better one haha.
Ade: You kidding me? Of course I didn’t haha!
Lance: Thank you, thank you. *bows*
Raymond: Naaah. Noooo! Harhar!
Anna: Given the chance, I would. LOL
[...] but forget it. The will-be winner of the Philippine Blog Awards gets a phallic trophy [...]
[...] Shari has written, the awards are prestigious and the esteemed judges are all experts in their chosen field(s), but [...]
I spent a few minutes rolling on the floor laughing. xD That was priceless. xDD
Raffs: Thank you!
Sadly, I won’t be able to use it. I hope someone would. 
baka may best acceptance speech category. panalo ka! haha
AJ: Hehe labo meeeen!!!
You know, I never knew that the Philippines was so big on blogging.
Corinne: If there’s one thing really great about the Philippines, it’s the Filipinos’ sense of community. We’ve always had a tight bond in whatever we do.
wahaha. talagang may acceptance speech ka na!
Atomicgirl: Maganda na ang handa hehe
those acceptance speech are just pretty hornylarious
now that you’re a nominee … we’ll see how you’ll actually do that speech on stage, if ever
happy blogging
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