Twit, Mikaela Fudolig, BIKE-Kasyon, and Diet: Need to Bring SEX(y) Back!
I’m bringing sexy back, and I mean that both literally and figuratively. *mimics Jeff*
I miss writing blabbering. I contemplated just twitting/twittering to write sporadic one-liners, but I’ve been seeing too many “Twitter Updates for yyyy/mm/dd” in my feed reader that I just trashed the idea immediately. It also helps that there’s a Twitter scandal going on because of the spontaneous “blogging” venue it provides. I don’t want to experience another “foot in mouth disease” yet again. And I need to have something shallow to complain about — like me not being able to update my Twitter in more than three months, for instance.
But my head has become loaded with too much ideas that it’s practically buried six feet under now. I would have blogged about the Virginia Tech massacre, or the One Day Blog Silence campaign, but I have this habit of not blogging about topics everyone blogs about. It’s not that I want to be different, but if I can’t add anything more to the discussion, why bother echoing other’s thoughts?
UP Diliman’s youngest summa cum laude is only 16 years old. I’ve known Mikaela Irene D. Fudolig since high school, having attended Quezon City Science at the same time she did. I’m pretty sure I’ve blogged about her in one of my past entries. She’s a pretty amazing kid, isn’t she? Her appearance hasn’t even changed a lot since I last saw her personally (in a bathroom in QueSci, of all places). Hopefully, she’ll make use of her gift wisely and for the country.
I’ve just watched Howie Severino’s Bike-kasyon sa Bohol on TV. Times like this, I wish I knew how to ride a bike. Really. In addition to my having no sense of direction, I also have absolutely no concept of balance. How sweet. Bohol is such a breathtaking place, and it’s definitely in one of my must-see places in the Philippines. I wish I was there with Howie, feeling the cold air as he and his companion entered the man-made forest on their way to the ever famous Chocolate Hills. I first knew of Howie’s trip (stop snickering, close kami kaya first-name basis, hehe) to Bohol when I read his comment on Sir Dominique’s blog. I didn’t know it would be aired on television.
So enough niceties, and on to the real dilemma….
Last Sunday, my family and I went to the mall to…go out. I made lambing to my father to buy me a complete set of smart casual outfit — minus the footwear, plus the underwear. He was more than willing to oblige, seeing that I finally took interest in being a “lady”, finally! He was sick and tired of my oversized shirts and jeans that he actually told me more than once to buy something quite pricey and classy to wear to look presentable in semi-formal gatherings. And some make-up. I just scoffed at him every time he went into his “Shari, you should at least try to look good” moments. Not interested in “looking good”. I wear powder and lip gloss, isn’t that enough?
But hey, I had a wonderful time trying on the different humongous clothes I could lay my hands on. I really tried to fit into them. Stomach in. I failed once, and it had to happen when I was drooling over that funky top. So then came the realization that I’ve become fatter than I thought I am.
I managed to find everything in just a little under a thousand pesos within an hour, but the old news that I’m such a pig just hit me hard. So I turned to my loving mother, who’s currently on a diet herself.
Me: I’m fat. I mean, I’m really really fat. *dazed look*
Nanay: I noticed that, but I didn’t want to say anything. *tries not to laugh at my face*
Me: I must have gained 50 pounds since late last year! *wails so loudly that the salesladies looked at me*
Nanay: Even your father said something about it. *giggles*
Me: I can’t fuckin’ believe it! I’m so faaaaaaaaaaaaat!!! *slits wrists*
Is it because I’m depressed? Is it because I’m bipolar? Is it because I lost my baby? Is it because the elections is nearing?
Is it because I don’t have a boyfriend and haven’t had someone to do some hardcore lip action with since I dumped my last sex slave? Or is it because I don’t have anyone to have sex with? What the heck is wrong with me?!
I have never gone on a diet. Losing weight just happens to me naturally. And so does gaining every pound back. I suck, I know (and I swallow too, hehe). But this is different. I even have a nasty collection of big bulges in my stomach! I’ve never had a big stomach even if I’m fat — except now! Oh noes! I’m gonna hit my 20’s in just a few months, and I want to feel good about it. And feeling good means being in a healthy and fit state of mind and body. The extra baggage simply must go!!!
The reason why I’m not such a big fan of trying hard to lose weight (or…going on a diet, as some people would put it) is because I don’t want to be sexy. I remember a talk with my best cousin last month while on our way to buy halo-halo. For the record, she’s the sexy-sexy type of young woman. Sorry guys, she’s already taken by a very good man.
Cousin: Shari, even if we’re fat we’re still sexy, no?
Shari: What the hell are you saying? *looks at her from head to toe*
Cousin: I mean, we still have curves. Sexy!
Shari: Oh yeah, great! What type of curves? The concave one, or the little convex ones?
Cousin: Gaga! You’re such a retard!
Hah, I love my cousin.
So anyway, what is it with being sexy ba? I don’t want to be sexy. I’m having a hard time warding off the sex maniacs as it is, and I don’t want some more superficial Neanderthals who ogle at my boobs and ass coming my way. The only reasons why I always seem to attract (somewhat older) guys are:
- I’m very photogenic. If you don’t believe me, look at my pictures. Even better, look at the photos I took of myself before the chickenpox. Then ask the people who have seen me in person if I look anywhere near as good as I do in my portraits.
- I’m from a science high school and “the premier” state university in the country. Which gives people this terrible idea that I’m a “brains and beauty” type of person.
- I’m politically-inclined, which, to some people, translates into being smart.
- I’m a jelly. I can fit in just about anywhere — figuratively speaking, of course (I can’t even fit into my clothes nowadays). I can hang out with people double my age. I can have fun with people my age. I love being with people half my age. I’m flexible just like that.
- I’m cheap. No, not the kind of cheap you’re thinking. I’m very matipid. So the guys I go out with spend less than what they do on their other dates.
- When you talk with me, the topic can be just about anything. Politics, sex, entertainment, sex toys, the Philippine society, more sex toys, geekology, sexual pleasure, music, anything about sex…Generally speaking, of course.
- I can be extremely horny. ‘Nuff said.
The bottom line is that I need to lose weight. And I want to do it as safely as I possibly can, without abusing myself and my self-control in the process. So if it means having to find a man to have steamy scenes in the bedroom and lose weight with, then so be it. Heck, studies even show that obese people who lose weight enjoy better sex lives, so I have nothing to lose except the excess pounds, right? The “working out” part of the diet can be sex! I’ll be both healthy and super duper happy…What more can I ask for? 
So go on a sex diet, I say!
Now how many times have I written the word “sex” in this entry? 
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I think you wrote the word sex or related to it 10 times. Hmmmm even I havent done that yet!
I kind of want to tally how many times you said sex but hmmm… I lost count after awhile.
Man, I wanna lose weight, too! I refuse to step on the scale to find out how much I’ve gained. I really need to get in shape. We can do this!
Except I’m not sure I wanna do the “sex diet” with you
lol
LOL about not wanting to blog about topics that everyone’s blogging about. That’s me… I don’t like to make my blog “just another blog”… LOL.
Wow, crazy that she’s only 16 and is a Summa Cum Laude!
Anyways, give your weight to me! I need to gain weight… LOL… LOL about “looking good” also… I’m not really a tomboy, nor am I a girly girl… I’m just in between…
Hehehe, I’m cheap also! In the way that you’ve said!!!!! LOL.
When I was in my early twenties I didn’t realize I had gained 20 lbs. But because I wanted to look good, I enrolled in a fitness gym. Anyway, the main reason for you to lose weight should be for health reasons. Wishing you the best of luck in losing all that weight.
One of the questions that I fear the most from my gf is the “Am I fat?” question.
Every time she asks me that, I pray to high heavens to help me in answering such an impossible question.
You’re definitely back! “Sex” counts to a dozen while “sex-y” counts up to eight.
Kulit ng pinsan mo. Haha.
I have to go on a diet+exercise routine. I’ve gained 20 pounds since college. Ugh.
Hey, welcome back. I guess you hsould start dieting soon? XP And you don’t have to be sexy to get a good sex. Oh, btw, I was told na nakakapayat pala ang sex. It’ll be a good excersise. *lmao*
About my blog, try using proxy servers for it. It’s been that way since I moved host, I don’t exactly know what happened but according to my current host, it’s only because of the ISP.
Wow sis.. ang haba naman nito. Lol. Anyways, we went to Bohol na din eh. We went through the man-made forest.
nakakatakot nga lang.. lol. Ang tataas ng mga trees dun.. 
But anyway, yeah.
In my own opinion, wearing lip gloss is OK already. But with powder? Semi-OK.
Getting fat, I believe, is kinda OK. As long as hindi siya so-sobra sa limit niya (you know), hehe. But extra bulges that you haven’t seen before when you were fat and just now? Baka….magpa-checkup ka. Lol. Seriously.. :stareyes:
Whaha.. that’s a funny conversation that you have there with your cousin..lol. Parang ang sweet niyo naman…=p
10 times. I think you’ve mentioned “sex” ten times. Yep, 10 times more or less
No, it’s not because you’re depressed, Shari. It’s because food can be sinfully delicious. I officially entered the normal weight bracket last month. Lexie’s not underweight anymore. And if I keep eating, I’m going to turn into a blimp.
Haha, I kind off got turned off from sex. I watched season 1 of Grey’s Anatomy last night, and saw the episode where one of the surgeons gets syphilis when he sleeps with a nurse. But don’t worry, it’s just a phase, my mind won’t be able to resist my hormones.
shari… being fat is just a state of mind. dont be fooled by the adverts that being uber thin is sexy.
oi> kung sa friday after yung plano. baka makasama ako. san batalaga? basta strictly no alcohol. work ako eh.
at paki barrage ako ng phone-gising 0918 493 4051 aheheh tulog kasi ako nyan eh. para magising ako ahehehehe
regards!
I know what you mean… I didn’t blog about the Virginia Tech Massacre and One Day Blog Silence… simply because I don’t really like jumping on “me too” topics… if I don’t have anything new (and by that, I mean “my fruity perspective”) to add to it, too. Besides, I’m not really sure I agree with the point of One Day Blog Silence. I respect the motives… but people use their blogs to “SPEAK OUT” for things that are important. Voice is action. And that crazy killer got partially into trouble by staying silence. He bottled up all that crazy shit. Maybe I’m being simplistic, but if that guy had reached out, he would’ve gotten some help sooner.
Sexy is not just outward. Sexy is inside. But yeah, it’s a good thing to try to stay fit… be healthy. I joined a gym this year and I’m enjoying it. I’m also enjoying ogling the sweaty half-naked bodies in the gym. Har.
Yey! you’re back! I love reading your long entries.
Hmm. Onga, dami ngang ’sex’ na word dito sa entry mo hahaha!
Chas: Haven’t done what, haven’t done what?
Felisa: We can do this! Sex diet, we can, just be safe, harhar!
Simply-Precious: I’ll gladly transfer my excess to you! Really!
Noemi: Maybe I should too, since it’s summer. But I’d rather do the “exercising” on my own and pocket the money, hehe.
Jhay: Haha! Dreaded question ba? I don’t know, if I were your girlfriend, I’d want to hear the truth, no matter what it is.
Aja: And that’s, like, 3 years ago? And only 20 pounds? I’ve gained 50 pounds in just 6 months! Beat that!
Euri: Onga eh. Will diet, have lotsa sex. Hehe.
Nicole: Yeah, I write loooong entries. Crazy. My face is darned oily kasi (thanks to my dad) kaya pag hindi ako makapaghimalos, I cover my face up with baby (loose) powder.
Lexie: Food is sinful, haha. And wtf, don’t get turned off from sex! It’s even more sinfully delicious than food! LOL!
Eric: I’m fat. I’ve been this way since I was a kid. Don’t worry, I don’t get fooled by the ads on TV. Pake ko ba dun, basta ako ganito haha! Sa Friday talaga ung plano. Sige, di ka namin pipilitin mag-alcohol. Kwentuhan lang naman eh.
FruityOaty: Weeh, exactly what I thought about it.
Okay, now I officially envy you. Half-naked bodies…I’m gonna sign up for the nearest gym later!!! 
Joni: And you didn’t even bother to count them, haha!
Do you still need a partner for the s*x part of the loose weight program? ;-)
ang gulo ng entry! sobrang suppressed ka no
may pa hiatus hiatus pang nalalaman kasi eh :P
i hate twit. i hate the idea of being online 24/7. if i’m not blogging, i’m on xbox live. hahah. im good enough with that
what about friday now??
Shari, we need to setup a party list for people who can’t ride bikes! We have to be heard! No more freakin’ bike lanes!!! haha
I did not count how many times you mentioned the word sex and its derivatives. He he.
At least here, no innuendoes, unlike in other sites/comments he he.
I like the concept of Twitter, but I am having issues with the WP plugin, kept on getting that PHP warning messages. So I took the plugin down.
Goodluck on you sex diet!
Hehe. Thanks for the tip po, sis Shari!
Whoa! She’s only 16, and now, she earned a college degree (BS Physics)? Grabe, kung ganyan lang sana ako katalino. Haha.
Mainggit ka sa akin! Lol. Whatever I do, I don’t get fat. The downside is that sobrang payat ko naman.
Response to :
This one really made me laugh!
Bottom line ko? I need to gain weight!
PS: Baka gusto mong maghingi ng tips sa akin? Haha.
Believe it or not, the farthest place I’ve been to is actually the NAIA… don’t expect me to have seen Bohol or even Jose Rizal’s house.
Hehehehe..
you need to lose weight… jog and jog and jog every morning or maybe enroll in a combat sport. At least it’s not as boring as dieting or just going to the gym… you’ll even learn some self defense(maraming mandurukot and holduppers ngayon). I don’t know. I can’t give you an advise. All these years, no matter how much I sleep and eat, I never seem to really gain weight. I don’t know I think the fats are accumulating in my tighs and uhmm..buttocks…(that’s why I’m using anti-cellulite). But really my weight plays from 44 to 45 to 46 kilograms. Fast metabolism, I guess.
Heard that 16 y/0 cumlaude..reminds me of Sidis, the youngest boy to have entered Harvard. Such gifted “kids”. They’re one in a million and sana yung future child or apo ko, ganyan din! Hehe
I don’t know if I can still ride a bike. I haven’t road one in many years. I even used to know how to do roller blading..but I don’t know. I/m too old for these stuff….hehehe
Gah! Disjointed comments din ako:
- I like Twitter when I want to stalk. (Stupid yung “scandal”. When you put stuff online, you have to suffer the consequences.) Pero mahirap makisabay dahil…
- …Kuripot din ako! I can’t believe I’m saying this but, yeah, I like to stay thrifty most of the time. I only spend a lot when it’s worth it. ^^
- True, mahirap talaga magjudge about the massacre. Yun lang. Unless you were related to one of those killed, I don’t think there’s anything new to contribute to the sadness in the blogosphere.
- Kaklase ko si Mikaela ng Math54. Halos katabi pa nga e. Gusto ko porma nya—sorta’ preppy + nude-colored boots! Whee!
- Gusto ko rin bumili ng whole new set of clothes mostly because ma-i-niiiiiiiit! Hats and shades included.
- No comment na lang sa sexiness. Natutulala na lang ako sa lahat ng nakikita ko sa TV (e.g. ASF dancers on Wowowee). Sigh. Speaking of Grey’s Anatomy though… tingnan mo si Callie. Astig.
yeah. i’ve read about that 16-yr old summa cum laude.. GWA of 1.099 wahaha ang talino….
pa link nga po pala… hehe.. i linked you.
argh, nagcomment ako dito kanina kaso sabi the server cannot load. anyway.
anyway, what’s substantial with THAT comment is that.. you don’t look like.. ho..rn…y.
yah. you look formal.
ahehhe.
I disagree with him^
Shari is horny. Very horny. 
and yes, she’s photogenic. Oist. How am I supposed to find your red-hot-smoldering-piece-of-pumipintig-manhood if you think you’re fat? Confidence girl!
oh and btw, the word sex was written 20 times (including the sex in sexy) hahahahaha
Uy pinasan! Welcome back to the world of babble!
it’s hard to follow diets.
haha. im going to get enrolled at Fitness First, i’ve finally had my parents to sign me up. I’ve just came home from the hospital, because I had to get a check up and medical certificate. im overweight. 
tomorrow i’ll have my blood tests and stuff. The purpose of losing weight isnt just to be “sexy”, it’s also for your own health. 
ate! let’s go to gym together!
i swear, it’s fun at Fitness First! hahaha!
the word sex attracted me!
sex diet… parang ang saya nun!!!
ang sexy hindi magiging sexy kung walang confidence. confidence is what you have so i you are already sexy.
but if you want to drop few pounds off the scale, that’ll be great for you and your health as well!
o ayan billycoy, naghahanap ka ng juicy diba?
nyahahahah 
Response to 5637:
fitness first? err. give yourself six months at most, if you dont get results, you know something’s not working
im betting an arm and a leg you won’t get substantial results
I guess I’m always late on things. I just discovered Twitter and thought it’s a new thing. I’m enjoying it so far.
I’ve always been in a battle with my weight. I’ve lost considerable weight last year but I realized it’s easy to gain it back if I’m not too careful. Life!
BTW, I want to thank you for your comment on my blog regarding “Friendship Gone Astray.” Thanks for sharing your experience. I appreciate it. Take care!
In my experience, nobody really has the “secret” about losing weight. People will give you different advice about how you should lose weight, what you should eat, what you should drink, when to exercise, etcetera. The basics may be the same for everyone like eat less fatty foods, load up on vegetables, things like that. But because different people have different metabolic rates, not all “diet regimens” will work for them. Just try different regimens (but remember to stick only to the healthy ones) and see what works for you :-)
Isn’t this the greatest comeback in blogging history or what!!!??? Move over, JesusfuckingChristonapopsiclestick!
oh ghad i should lose weight too i sooooo faaaaaat it’s not even funny. but hey, i’d rather die busog than die gutom. ang dukha naman if i die of hunger di ba. haha my god im so bad.
No, no. That was 20 pounds in 1 summer (2 months)—my weight has been a little bit steady this past 2 years. Now, beat that.
Nakita ko yung Bohol sa mga videoke, gusto ko rin pumunta dun e.
19 ka pala nagkachickenpox? Ako bago magcollege. Hirap noh? Tas kainis may marks pa.
Huwag ka na uminom! Lalaki lalo tiyan mo. Hehe.
I am FAT too. lol. I’ve never really been thin my whole life. but i prefer it this way. i can’t imagine myself being thin, without my healthy boobies and a-ok ass. lol. so don’t worry about it.
9 - 10 times. Haha. :P I remember.. a shirt my classmate wore once…
“Why do all girls think they are fat?”
hehe.. ako din feel ko ngayon getting chubbier… hehe
I know what you mean about blogging about the things every blogs about! But that One Day Blog Silence has got me thinking.. I actually think it’s useless and really a form of chain letter. I don’t see how posting a picture with no words linking to their website for people to do the same shows respect for the people who died. I think its extremely devestating, but I don’t think increasing some douchebag’s pagerank is the way to show you care.
Hmm, I’m still yet to know what Twitter is.. I keep seeing the links everywhere for it, but I haven’t been bothered clicking them!! And as interesting as I find you and your blog, seeing the Twitter links here is no exception!
Fantastic fun-filled post! Now all I can think about is jelly.
nakakatawa yung dialogue nyo ng pinsan nyo.. hehehe..
These days sex makes the world go round…hehehe…
waw sabaw!
grbe! onting kadyot nalang porn site na toh ate shari!
jusme! bwhhahahah
ako nga nde tumataba eh, huhu gusto ko manlang mag gain ng weight huhu.
wilkom back ngapala. ehehe
Hala! Ang dami mong sinabi, pero parang ang gusto mo lang palabasin ay..
Response to :
LOOOOOOOOOL. Hurray for people who have an inactive sex life! Woot woot!
hehe tama may curve pa naman soo okay okay lang bwhahaha! ayee sis can u change my link..if ever nakalink ako sau hehehe
i have a new blog.. hayy feels so good to drop to ur site once again.
Welcome back sa pagbloblog, alam naman naming di mo matitiis iwanan ang blogosphere. Hehe.
Bat kaya ganon may mga taong hirap magpapayat at hirap magpataba. Siguro we really just have to leart how to love ourselves, and our bodies.
you’re not fat. you’re sexy. haha! anyway, nakakapagpapayat daw ang guess what: SEX. ewan pero narinig ko lang yan. nyahaha!
Grabe yung Mikaela na yun!!! Hyper to the next level nabalitaan ko nga sa T.V!
Oh come on! Your so bragging about the photogenic thingy ulet ha, ako din naman ah photogenic nyahaha!
Noh na palang balita sa Inuman Session???
Ang bilis ko tinamad sa twitter pero medyo nakaka-aliw manuod ng twittervision pagwala na talaga ko magawa haha
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Hindi ka ata natulog nun e…
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Asteeg nung henyo-kid
Hmm, my sister has also resolved to lose weight. She seems more determined this time. :P
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Ang pinagkaiba lang, when I met you was that you had bloodshot eyes lol
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I suck, I know (and I swallow too, hehe) –> lol!
one of my greatest talents is looking innocent.. no one believes my close friends when they tell people I crack green jokes (a lot) haha
sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex
sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex
(just cause ctrl+v is ftw! lol)
tanginang sex na yan.
anyway, dang, Mikaela’s speech has been circulating the mailing lists starting last night. kids like her make me feel like an idiot, depressed, and suicidal. 
haaaay, sana lang she’ll remain ideal and that she’d get interested in sex late.
anyway, mabalik tayo sa sex. alam mo ba na, ay, wait, pota may tumatawag sa akin.
conversely, i’m so thin that raindrops during typhoons miss me hahaha
Response to :
whatever the case or reason, you should know that many of us guys find smart women sexy. why? because what the mind can conceive… nya ha ha
It’s easier to lose weight when you’re single. Look at me, everytime I fall into a new pseudo-relationship with a man, I get too comfortable with my body that I let go of myself. I gain weight. And then don’t bother to lose it, because they say that although “tumataba ka ah”, I’m still sexy (for them).
I’m gaining weight again. I dont know if that’s a good thing or not :P